Never Think

So perhaps this is one of the most difficult times of my life. I feel like Bella did in New Moon when Edward up and left her. She couldnt function, for months...She constantly had nightmares and would wake up screaming..she was so devastated that she ultimately became numb......I think Iv reached that point and that is why I have to head home for a little to heal..

I look at myself in the mirror and CANNOT believe that I have gotten myself in so deep that I actually have to leave California and my career for a little to get back on track.. That is totally not my character, how did this happen? When did this happen? Just a few weeks ago everything was normal...as normal as it usually is..The ground has been stolen from underneath me and I can no longer walk. I have fallen into this deep dark hole and I cant seem to find my way out.

I should have saved my soul before I was too far gone and nothing could be done...too late....

I watched Twilight today...I think that makes it over 100 times..(no joke) Although I do enjoy the film, mostly because Robert Pattinson is dangerously beautiful, I do like the books better...The character Edward Cullen is like a drug. Edward Cullen is the reason why you have 20 and over year olds OBSESSED with Twilight...because every girl wants a guy like Edward..a guy that would do ANYTHING for you, go to any lengths to protect you, choosing you over family, over friends, over EVERYTHING..what girl wouldnt want that? Unft..there is no such man that exists..Iv yet to see that. Wheres my Edward Cullen?

Anyway, the soundtrack to Twilight is super great...and Robert Pattinson has a track on there that he sang called Never Think. Its one of my favorite songs in the whole wide world, mainly because of the lyrics but also because he has a haunting unique voice. Its been my ringtone for over a year now and the lyrics couldnt be anymore true....


Can I at least get a Jacob Black???